IELTS Band 7 Essay | Agree/Disagree | Media
In some countries, celebrities complain about the way the media publicizes their private lives. Some people say that they should accept it as part of their fame. Do you agree or disagree?
Submitted on: Wed Nov 06 2024
Journalists and paparazzi can be annoying, chasing and stalking famous individuals and sharing details of their private lives with the public. At first glance, this may seem inappropriate. However, upon a deeper examination of this phenomenon, it can appear more acceptable.
After all, paparazzi do this because celebrities are interesting and attractive to many people. Scrolling through the news and tracking the life of a favourite actress, for example, is for many of us just a way to switch off from daily routine and feel closer to our favourite singer. Sometimes, details about famous individuals' private lives can even be lifesaving for someone. For instance, my sister discovered that she had a third of ovarian cancer. At the same time, news emerged about similar health issues concerning Princess Kate Middleton. This news, in some way, made my sister empathize with the situation and encouraged her to fight the disease. Therefore, I believe that publicity should be a part of a social contract with famous individuals, and they should accept it. Being interesting to the public is an essential part of their career.
However, there are certain cases where such infringements on private lives should be restricted. First of all, this is particularly connected with celebrities' children, who must be protected from situations that can cause them psychological damage. For example, we sometimes see paparazzi publishing naked photos of children or journalists disclosing information about adoptions. Such actions can be very harmful to children's mental health and may even lead them to commit suicide. Thus, there should be a clear demarcation line.
In conclusion, close attention is a normal part of public life, and everyone who wants to become famous should understand that this openness comes with the territory. However, there should also be areas where journalists should not intervene, particularly concerning celebrities' children.
- Task Achievement: 7
- Coherence And Cohesion: 6
- Lexical Resource: 7
- Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 6
Feedback:
The essay presents a balanced argument, exploring both sides of the issue. The examples are relevant and well-chosen, showcasing a good understanding of the topic. The structure is clear, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the writing could benefit from more concise language and fewer repetitions. Some grammatical errors are present, including the use of "close attention" instead of "close scrutiny."
